final paper 3

Data Analysis:
I want to concentrate and analyze three sessions. The first tutoring session was with a freshman girl that we will call Molly. Molly was nervous coming to the Writing Center, and did not know what to expect from the tutor. It was her first time coming to the WC.
After brief introduction:
T: So, Molly, what do you want to work on today?
M: Um, I don’t know. I have to do a persuasive essay.
T: Do you have an assignment sheet? What class is this for?
M: It’s my English comp class, the teacher didn’t give us an assignment sheet, but I have notes from class.
T: Very good, so do you understand the assignment?
M: Not really, I never had to do this before.
Here the tutor pauses, trying to decipher the students notes, and what she needs help with. Her notes are detailed, probably written straight from the board or from a book.
T: Have you thought of a topic yet? Anything that interests you?
M: I was thinking of doing it on the war.
T: Hmm?
M: Like on why we should not be in the war. My brother is in Iraq.
T: Oh, well I’m sorry to hear that. I’m guessing your anti-war?
M: Yeah.
T: Okay, lets start by listing some pros and cons. Why are you anti war, and back it with some facts.
M: Okay. (Molly stares at the paper for about 2 minutes). I guess because a lot of soldiers died.
The tutor is frustrated by this weak statement, and tries to redirect Molly’s focus on her notes.
T: How about you start with, “The war on terror has taken many lives, so we should not send more troops there?”.
Molly smiles, “ I get it”. The tutor is then able to help the student with the introduction, but comes to a standstill after a sentence or two. Molly is just typing what the tutor says, and needs a lot of prompting. The tutor realizes that Molly wants the tutor to write the paper. Molly gave up ownership of her paper, allowing the tutor to give her own ideas. “Writers should feel welcome to explore their own ideas and find their own ways to express them,”(McAndrew 19), however, Molly was either too timid or unprepared to write her assignment.
T: Molly, I can’t write this paper for you, this is your assignment, however, I can guide you and help you with some ideas.
In this session, the tutor was frustrated with Molly’s lack of interest or knowledge of her paper. Collaboration was not an issue in this session, as Molly gave the tutor all ownership to the paper. The tutor felt that she had to guide Molly along every step, and when Molly said something, the tutor had to encourage a lot and give false praise to keep the conversation flowing. While McAndrew and Reigstad said “Writers need honest feedback, not empty flattery” (Tutoring Writing 17), the tutor hoped that to an insecure freshman who had no background knowledge of writing persuasive essays false praise might make the writer surer about her writing. This session demonstrated the frustration of tutoring freshmen, who come unprepared, unsure, and with little knowledge of the subject matter. The tutor was able to help Molly was an introduction, and three main sentences, and encouraged Molly to come back to the tutoring center.
While freshmen are harder to tutor because of their insecurity and little knowledge of assignments, upperclassmen need help with small details. A second example of a tutoring session comes from a sophomore college student, who needs help with a history paper. Kelly came into the tutoring center and threw her books and folders on the desk, unzipped her coat, and started talking to the tutor immediately. With little prompting, she told the tutor her assignment; a history paper on the novel “Flags of Our Fathers”.
T: I never read the book, can you tell me about it?
K: It’s a memoir about this guy and his friends and their story about rising the flag in Iwo Jima and the struggles they went through.
T: Okay, so what did you have to do for this assignment?
K: Ummm… (some hesitation).. find two things in your life to relate to the story, compare and contrast.
T: Wow, that sounds hard. What did you write so far?
Here, the tutor makes the student read her paper out loud, while the tutor takes notes on several mistakes, including thesis statement, diction, and some grammatical errors.
T: Is English your second language?
K: No, oh my god I know its bad right? I’m such a terrible writer. I don’t know why I picked to major in history…
The tutor offends the student, and while the student does have weak sentences, it is significantly better than an ESL student, though not as good as a native speaker. The tutor apologizes, and changes the subject to some things she noticed in the paper. Kelly has a very weak thesis, which is easily fixed with stronger, more concise vocabulary. There are several “fluff” sentences that had nothing to do with the main topic, and were erased. The tutor spent several minutes explaining comma rules, and had the student look up a website to help her understand. Whenever the tutor pointed out another punctuation mistake, the student got embarrassed, knowing that she should know punctuation, however, she took all criticism with a smile and needed little encouragement. Kelly is a high level writer, she focused first on her paper in general, rewrote the thesis, fixed some sentences with the help or the tutor, but most importantly, after a few minutes, understood comma rules. The tutor sat back and let Kelly fix her errors, and praise such as “You got it! Good job”, boosted Kelly’s self esteem and the tutor saw how confident Kelly fixed her paper. Lastly, the tutor spent a large amount of time on MLA citations, which the student never learned properly. Overall, the session was only 25 minutes because the student knew what she was doing and needed little help. The tutor let the student leave early but asked Kelly to have a peer proof read or come back to the WC before turning the paper in.
Finally, the last session I want to concentrate on was for two students who were partners for a presentation. These two students, who we will call Kendra and Christine, are seniors. They are nursing majors, and this is their presentation to the head of the department in order to graduate. They are both from Nigeria, and have been in ESL classes for everything but their major courses.
T: Okay, so what do you want to do today?
K: (in heavy accented English) We made a power point for class. We want you to proof it with us. It is a very important presentation. (Notice that Kendra said “with us”. )
T: Do you have an assignment sheet or any instructions from your professor.
C: No, this is our senior presentation. We can do what we want. We printed out the presentation for you. (hands presentation to tutor)
K: I hope it’s good. Do you think so?
T: Let’s see what we have here first, do want to go through the slides with me and discuss anything you’re not sure about?
Kendra and Christine gather around the printed out slides and take out red pens, allowing the tutor to practice minimalist tutoring. The tutor does not know anything about the subject matter, instead points out citation mistakes and punctuation. Both students ponder over any errors and ask why it has to be corrected. The tutor has no teaching experience, and directs them to a citation website, where all three read the proper way of citing in a presentation.
T: Good job! See, you have very few errors, and I hope you get a good grade on this.
(K & C laugh) C: This is not for grade, this is to graduate.
T: Oh, I think you know what you are writing, just get confused with all these English rules. I had the same problem. Sometimes it’s easier when someone looks it over because you can’t always catch your mistakes. But I think you’re ok with this presentation.
After several more minutes of questions, the session was over, and the students went to class. Kendra and Christine were more knowledgeable about the subject than the tutor; the tutor could not correct the truthfulness of the statements, rather, few grammatical and structural mistakes. Both girls took ownership of the presentation, and after a few minutes started to correct the slides themselves, which proves that they learned what was wrong in their presentation, and hopefully, will remember that in their future presentations. Though the tutor did not know Kendra and Christine’s writing abilities in previous years, they were high ability writers and took the tutors advise to further their development.
Freshmen have trouble starting a paper and the big picture of writing. Just like Molly, who did not know what to write about and came unprepared, she needed to be guided through her entire paper, from brainstorming to conclusion. Molly was insecure and unsure of her writing ability, and expected her tutor to watch her write every sentence. The tutor had to use a lot of encouragement and reinforcement, “You got it!” “You know this!” in order to keep the session moving. Upperclassmen such as Kelly, Kendra, and Christine were prepared for their tutoring sessions, knew what they needed help with, and corrected their work themselves. They were more sure of their writing, and asked the tutor specific questions.